Clive thinks it would hurt to fall off a wagon. Clive’s fallen off the wagon, but it feels more like he fell and was subsequently trampled by the wagon.
Last night it all got too much and Clive drank. Sobriety and therapy was bringing to the front of his mind things he’d spent a long time suppressing. Things like his abusive family, his previous failed relationships, his lack of trust and most importantly his low self worth. Things he had been carefully preserving in alcohol. Last night Clive drank a lot.
He crawled to the toilet
And slept in the fetal position on the bathroom floor
Falling off a literal wagon doesn’t come with self loathing, judgment, disappointment or a hang over in the morning. Clive would prefer to fall off a real wagon next time.